Here is all I can think about: What if he gets on that bus and never looks back? Doesn't even wave to me? How will I know if he sat alone on the bus? What did he eat for lunch? How much or did he throw it away? Is his desk a mess? Does he get in trouble in class? Is he shy? Talkative? What if some big kid picks on him? How is his speech? Is he stuttering more or less? Should they not call on him? Will they call me if he cries? Does he have friends? What if his crayons are broken? Or his markers are dried out? Who will make sure he gets on the correct bus? OMG what if he doesn't get off the bus?
He is SO little. Sometimes I think too little to go off to school for the day. At his kindergarten screening, some teacher whom he never met before came over, said Hi and whisked him away. And he went, just like that. And I admit I cried. He looked so little walking down that hallway. We both didn't know where he was going. And the 45 minutes it was supposed to take turned into an hour and 15 minutes and I. was. freaking. out. Then he came bounding out of the classroom with all these stickers on his shirt, a new pencil and a book and he was happy. Me: a complete mess. I have thought about homeschooling but Steve feels every child should go to school. And in some ways I do too. I liked school for the most part. I always looked forward to the first day and shopping for new clothes and supplies. It wasn't until High School that I began counting down the days till I got the heck away and went off to college. But then I think if he was home, I would know he was safe. Which is probably selfish of me. I just don't know how to let go. People say when I have the 3rd baby I will be happy to send him. That doesn't make any sense to me. How would having another make me miss him any less?
I am only looking forward to buying school supplies, putting "Brady" stickers on them and buying a cute backpack/lunchbag combo. Not looking forward to him actually using these things. The PBK catalog arrived and he wants Spider-Man. Yup, not cute dinosaurs like his mom wants to get. An ugly super-hero that shoots spider webs. And you know my feelings on spiders. (They must all die!)
Mom's choice:
It's funny what you remember. When I was little, my mom would only buy plain folders and notebooks. I remember how badly I wanted some pink or purple writing paper but it never happened or an NKOTB folder. SO, Brady's mom will buy him whatever folders he wants! Wrestlers, Jake and the Neverland Pirates, whatever. And I will also buy fun book covers. I always had the brown paper bag covers that were never cool. Maybe I am a little jealous of all these cool supplies. Oh and seriously, isn't glue better with glitter in it? I think so.
September 5th better not come in a hurry because I am NOT ready!
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